Happy Fourth of July - the day after

A day late and a dollar short as they say.  Happy 4th of July, the day after, or as we say around here, "Happy Thursday".  To make up for the slackness of not posting on the day, here are some quotes from a gun packing, bible believing, God fearing, USA loving conservative.

Things to remember today, from Will Rogers… first and foremost remember to never squat with your spurs on

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3. There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.

8. There are three kinds of men:

~ The ones that learn by reading.

~ The few who learn by observation.

~ The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10. If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.

The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

Hope you had a Happy Fourth

How Quickly Things Turn

Shortly after I posted that last entry about giving people a pass, a friend of mine called and unloaded about her week and how people hurt her and on and on.  Interestingly, I was able to quote that fellow I quoted in my last post and I waxed all philosophical urging her to be gracious and let go and so forth and so on.

Later in the conversation she started to talk about something and I was half listening.  I don't know what grabbed my full attention but it developed that she was talking about my late husband.  She told me things she thought about our relationship that she had never revealed before.  She was and is the friend I have known the longest.  She lived through every minute of my first marriage.  During my troubles she never once let me know what she felt she must let me know now.  She shouldn't have let me know it.  I found myself in the position of hearing things that were untrue and unkind and I had to be gracious.  As I had just advised her, I had to take my advice.  I did it but truth be told I am still in pain and questioning a very long establised friendship.

Funny how things turn and twist isn't it?

Just thinkin'

Just read a story, or at least I skimmed a story, about the brawls and bad behavior of the Secret Service while on Nantucket during one or more of the One's vacations.  Why now are the stories being reported?  Perhaps if the press had been doing it's job then, the embarrassment of recent Secret Service behavior could have been avoided.  After all, isn't that what the press is supposed to do?  Report, not take dictation. 

I think we can view the current political mess as one which could have been avoided if the press had done it's job in the run up to the past election.  Investigate.  Report.  No Propaganda.  If they had and the One won and he may have, all this grindingly obvious nonsense about his past and agenda would be out there.  He won despite his connections with socialists, communists, terrorists and crazed evangelical black power people.  We all knew and elected him anyway.  How much better it would be today.

Do your job press puppets.  Don't do any one's bidding.  Stop lifting the lid on high school stories about the One's adversary and ignoring everything about himself.  Put everything out there and let the people decide.

Never happen.  They're too deep in the tank.

Where's your pass?

I just read this somewhere in my wanderings on the net, it's about the things people say when you have a serious, possibly terminal illness:

"But here’s the point I want to make about the stuff people say. Unless someone looks you in the eye and hisses, “You fucking asshole, I can’t wait until you die of this,” people are really trying their best. Just like being happy and sad, you will find yourself on both sides of the equation many times over your lifetime, either saying or hearing the wrong thing. Let’s all give each other a pass, shall we?"

That last sentence gave me pause.  "Let's all give each other a pass, shall we?"  I was about to comment on that blog and blah blah blah about grace and be gracious.  Before I could reach the keyboard I was struck with my own limitations in that regard.  I didn't have a terminal illness or even an illness to speak of.  I was less than 25 and dating a very wild guy.  He was older and experienced and not at all like the guys I had ever even met not to mention dated.  Two of my married friends, who had married the type of guy I had normally encountered or dated, were with me one afternoon and, for whatever reason, they felt the need to counsel me.  Their counsel was so self-righteous and condemning that I have carried it with me to this day.  Maybe now's the time to give them a pass.  They were merely wrapping themselves in their blanket of smug and pointing out to me the wrongness of my choices.  The stinging part is that they reached so far back in my life to show me who they thought I was and they were so wrong about what they thought I was up to back then.  I thought my "friends" knew me.  I was wrong.  I was hurt.  I went through what I once read was the most painful surgery known to man.  I had my eyes opened.  I should thank them for that.

That was over 40 years ago.  I have seen these women multiple times since.  I put on a friendly demeanor.  I never refer to that day long ago.  I never forget it though.  I think it's time to do that.  Be gracious.  Give them a pass.  Shake it off and finally let it go.

I love the Blog world.  It's the best therapy ever.

Paraprosdokians

Here's a good one:

What are Paraprosdokians?

They are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong

5. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right - only who is left..

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

9. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

10. Buses stop in bus stations. Trains stop in train stations. On my desk is a work station.

11. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

12. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'

13. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

14. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

15. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
16. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.

17. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

18. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

19. There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

20. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

21. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

22. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target

23. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

24. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

25. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

26. Where there's a will, there are relatives.

AND 27.

I'm supposed to respect my elders, but its getting harder and harder to find one.

Health Tip

My morning email:

As I was lying in bed pondering the problems of the world, I rapidly realized that I don't really give a rat's hiney. It's the tortoise life for me!




1. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.

2. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, and is fat.

3. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 8 months.

4. A tortoise doesn't run and does nothing, yet it lives for 450 years.


And you tell me to exercise?? I don't think so. I'm retired. Go around me.

Travel 2012

Gotta love it....sent to me via email

My inconclusive travel plans 2012

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.


I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.


I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.


I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.


I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!

I may have been in Continent,�but I don't remember what country I was in. It's an age thing.

PLEASE DO YOUR PART!

Today is one of the many National Mental Health Days throughout the year. You can do your bit by remembering to send an e-mail to at least one unstable person. My job is done!

Life is too short for negative drama and petty things. So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!

From one unstable person to another... I hope everyone is happy in your head - we're all doing pretty good in mine!

Nuthin'

Got nuthin', so here's a pretty picture for ya.

Spent Sunday filling six of these, I think they're pretty and it has rained ever since.  Good for them and I guess it means less work for us.  It just has rained or been gray for so many days.  As my grandmother used to say, "It makes me weary."

Another Mothers' Day

This has been a stretch of days with nothing to do but think.  April 29th would have been my mothers 100th birthday.  Happy Birthday Mom.  May 9th marks the 12th year of her passing.  May 10th would have been my brother's 72nd birthday.  Happy Birthday Sandy.  May 13th will be the 12th year I celebrate Mother's Day without a mother.  Ma (I always called her Ma and she probably would have preferred Mother) always told the story of the children in church on mothers' day.  Some had pink carnations and some had white.  The white carnations meant their mother was deceased and the pink meant she was alive.  My mother always said she felt so bad for the kids with the white carnations and now, I'm that kid.  Happy Mothers' Day Ma....love you a lot and miss you.  Say hi to everyone up there for me ... hope you are having a great time with all of them.

Rainy Days

I know we need this rain but, mercy, it's not just rain, it's a downpour and I wonder how long it can do this.  It has been raining for days.  Perhaps I exaggerate a tad but only a tad.  The puddle on our street which is usually quite large is bigger than I've ever seen it.  We have waterfront property.  The plants are certainly happy but how long will it be before even they become alarmed and need to dry their feet off? 

The biggest problem I have with this weather is that I roam the house and stop at the refrigerator with each pass through.  I am not hungry.  I am restless and looking and needing to chew.  "Why not gum?",  you may ask.  "It's not in the fridge.", I answer.  Much more of this and I will need to go shopping for larger and looser clothing.

 One other problem while I'm at it.  This weather gives me too much time to think.  I know.  It should give me time to do those exercises I keep threatening to begin.  It should.  It doesn't.  I think about it but I start a train of thought that moves me along to junior high when I would get out of school, head home for American Bandstand and a box of chips.  You heard that right.  There were potato chips in a box and I loved them.  I can't remember the brand name but they tasted kind of like potato sticks if you remember those.  I would grab the box, park in front of the tv and consume every one.  Then I would wonder why I was such a chubby, no, fat teen.  Why?  Why?  Well here I am again.  Different food groups same question.  Why?

I think that I have to go back in time, recreate the situation and find a new way through the problem. That means I will be fat and fourteen and home alone watching tv and eating chips while being miserable and pretending that I am Arlene dancing with Kenny on Bandstand or Spin really really likes me.  Sigh.  How to correct that one wonders. 

Thankfully the sun is now out and I have to go to the dump.  Whew.  Just when I thought I might have to be working through that adolescent angst which haunts me.  Oh well...there will be time later. 

Kiinda Punny

Stolen from another blog.....grouchyoldcripple.com.  It's a great visit.  I highly recommend it.

I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type-O.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.+
PMS jokes aren't funny, period.
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
Broken pencils are pointless.
What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
Velcro - what a rip off!
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
Earthquake in Washington obviously government's fault.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

RIP Chuck Colson

RIP Chuck Colson.  The lesson Chuck learned from Watergate was that God is able to redeem any sinner.  He claimed Jesus as his saviour and never looked back.  He served his time and served it well.  He left prison much like Joseph and led many to the Lord.  He was humbled and broken and put back together by God.  He served God and, in my opinion, served him well.  I will miss him.

The lesson the press learned from Watergate was that they could take down a Republican if they leaned heavily and ruthlessly and persistently enough and they have been trying to do it again ever since.  They could never (and would never) take down a Democrat since the Democrat would rather tear the country apart than resign.

Tis the Season

It's wonderful around here....step-daughter is in for the week from MS.  We are enjoying her so much.  My nephew is with us for the weekend and my brother-in-law and his family will be here for dinner.  We are surely blessed.  I hope this Easter season brings blessings to all.  I fluctuate between these two moods.  Here's one

And here's the other

He is Risen indeed!  Happy Easter everyone and I mean everyone....believers or not, after all Jesus died for ALL of us.

A Little Laugh

Kinda Funny and From my E-Mails:

An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time at that time of night.


The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the

effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late with

bad guys."

The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"

The man replies,

"That would be my wife."

Kinda Funny

Confession

An elderly man walks into a confessional. The following conversation ensues:

 

Man: 'I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitch-hiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each of them three times.'

Priest: 'Are you sorry for your sins?'

Man: 'What sins?'

Priest: 'What kind of a Catholic are you?'

Man: 'I'm Jewish.'

Priest: 'Why are you telling me all this?'

Man: 'I'm 92 years old ..... I'm telling everybody!'

From my emails

Isn't It Ironic?

 

The food stamp program, part of the Department of

Agriculture, is 'pleased' to be distributing the greatest amount of food stamps ever.

 

Meanwhile, the National Park Service, also part of the Department of Agriculture,

asks us to "please do not feed the animals" because the animals may grow

dependent and not learn to take care of themselves.

It does make you stop and think doesn't it?

Another Email

After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.

He looked at her for a while ... then said, "You're

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."

She asks ... "What does that mean?"

He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot.

She smiled happily and said ... "Oh, that's so lovely ... What about I, J, K?"

He said, "I'm Just Kidding!"

The swelling in his eye is going down and the doctor is fairly optimistic about saving his testicles.

Possibly Offensive Material to Follow....

From my email today - apologies to all left leaners and Democrats.  As the aplogists have stated, I'm sorry if you are offended.  I was taken out of context or misquoted or .... fill in the blanks with whatever you choose. 

Origin of Left and Right

Have you wondered why it is that Conservatives are called the "right" and Liberals are called the "left." By chance I stumbled upon this verse in the Bible: "The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool to the left." Ecclesiastes 10:2 (NIV). Thus sayeth the Lord. Amen

Can't get any simpler than that.

Spelling lesson: The last four letters in American; I can. The last four letters in Republican; I can. The last four letters in Democrats; rats. End of lesson. Test to follow in November, 2012.

Remember, November 2012 is to be set aside as rodent extermination month.

Followers Galore

Before I get started I must comment.  I went to the blogger stuff where it shows comments and page views and I noticed that I have 70 followers.  70?  for real?  Wow....thanks all of you and sorry I am so lame with the postings here.  I will strive to improve and be worthy of 70 followers....I am stunned and staggered. 

I now must post something today since there are 70 possible readers.  The pressure is mounting.  I must find a theme or a joke or a picture.  I know I rely on my emails totally and so to the email I go.

Hope you can read this....it is funny.  Have a good one - all 70 of you and if there are more out there then all you too.  I am speechless.......

Nuthin but a chuckle

I got nuthin'.  And when that happens, I do what I do best.....copy from my email.  This one made me laugh...hope it does the same for you.  I have to burst out of this mood rather than my jeans.  Later...

A hooded armed robber bursts into the Bank of Italy and forces the tellers to load a sack full of cash.


On his way out the door with the loot, one brave customer grabs the hood and pulls it off, revealing the robber's face.


The robber shoots the guy dead without hesitation!


He then looks around the bank to see if anyone else has seen him. He sees one of the tellers looking straight at him; the robber walks over and calmly shoots him dead.


Everyone by now is very scared and looking down at the floor.


"Dida anyone elsa see a my face?" calls the robber.


There follows a tense minute of silence.Then an elderly Italian gentleman, looking down, tentatively raises his hand and says:


"I tinka my wife caught a glimpse"

2012 Hope List

As I browse through the Internet stopping at various blogs I'm in the habit of reading, I note that most have set a list of their 2012 goals, pay attention here, goals, not resolutions.  Are resolutions so resolute that they strike fear in our hearts and we replace them with goals?  Are goals so much more flexible that we are able to live with the notion that we might not fulfill them?  These are things I ponder upon.  More on that later, on to my 2012 hopes.  Yes.  You heard me.  I have hopes, not goals, not resolutions, HOPES!  And here are some.

I hope to sit at my computer in the morning and not have to clear away the potato chip crumbs from the night before.  Yes, you read that right.  I really hope for that.

I hope to use the Curves membership I recently acquired and I mean go there, get on the circuit and do it physically not just use it as a motivating tool to do other things around the house that I would never do unless I wanted to avoid doing something else.  And yes!  that's how my Curves membership is being used currently.  It's like, well I would call the dentist and make that appointment but I really and truly need to scrub the shower tile with this toothbrush.  When I finish, I will call.  So see?  Instead of call the dentist, insert go to Curves and you've got it.  The house is really really getting clean but - sigh - I hope I will truly walk in the door at Curves and move.

I hope to play golf.  Used to.  Stopped.  Have to do it again because I really love it.  My hesitation is due to not having someone to play with.  That doesn't stop a man.  He will just go and wait to be sent out with anyone and this year, if the hubster is still suffering with aching this or that, I am going.  I hope.

I have more and will detail them from time to time but for now....oh, wait ... there's one more thing.  I hope to lose some weight and feel better.  Please note that this hope ties in very directly with that first hope listed.
I would write more but I have some shower tile to scrub.  Later Gater.

Happy New Year

Just came back from breakfast with friends at a local eatery and then to the beach for the New Year's Day splash.  We watched because as mild as the weather is right now, the water?, she is mighty chilly.  Now to watch the mighty Patriots turn around this mess of a game and win......we hope.  Happy New Year everyone.

Merry Christmas to All

I think I posted this before but it's so beautiful...I must repeat myself.  Merry Christmas everyone.  Happy Birthday Jesus.

A Nativity Scene was erected in a church yard.

During the night the folks came across this scene. An abandoned dog

was looking for a comfortable, protected place to sleep. He chose

baby Jesus as his comfort. No one had the heart to send him away so

he was there all night.

We should all have the good sense of this dog and curl up in Jesus's lap from time to time.

This is too sweet not to share.

Please note that the dog is a "shepherd!"

Update and Hello Winter

Well, the tree is done and candles are in the windows (most of them), a wreath is on the door.  Here's the final version of the tree.  I put it on facebook and got a lot of comments...not all nice.  Those people will get coal in their stockings and I hope they're wearing them when it happens.  Well, not really.  Here it is - TADA the tree

Not too much different than the last version but -- the gold bead garland and the ribbons have been added.  Now if only the presents were under there we'd be cookin'.

Here's our view this morning. 

Winter has finally said hello.  Not a screaming hello thank goodness, just a little wave of "Hi, I'm here and maybe will stop back later with more of these flake things."  Hope he forgets about that and just tosses those flake things around in ski country where they belong.  Well, once I scrape off the windshield, I'll be off and running to finish the presents for the out of state crowd so they can be shipped out tomorrow.  Wish me luck.

Out with the Turkey - In with the Tree

Thanksgiving is a thing of the past.  Load up the turkey things, the pilgrim things, the orange and yellow leaves and the harvest cornucopia and put them away.  Re-load the holly things and the wreath things and the red candles and the pointsettias and the Santa things.  Tis the season after all.  Asked the husband where the best spot for the tree would be and his response?  "In the garage", he replied grinchily.

No - not the garage.  The past several years there has been no room around here for a tree.  The house is teensy and the nieces, nephews and offspring of same keep getting bigger and bigger.  Now we all know that means more food but it also means more elbow room at the table and finally I had to move the table from it's normal spot to the living room and added a card table to it so that 16 could be seated.  All that to say, no room for a tree too.

This year we are finished with renovations, we have a bigger area for table and expansions and the living room is free for, well, living and that includes room for a tree.  While we had no tree I placed a large red bow on a floor lamp and put the presents under it.  I christened it the Christmas Lamp.  One of my nieces, the sister of Elf, has stomped her princess foot and declared, "No more Christmas Lamp, this year we want a tree."  So - banished to the garage for all those years, the Tree has returned....here it is halfway done

Happy Thanksgiving

17 Stages To Cooking a Turkey

 1.Go buy a turkey

2.Take a drink of whisky

3.Put turkey in the oven

4.Take another 2 drinks of whisky

5.Set the degree at 375 ovens

6.Take 3 more whiskys of drink

7.Turk the bastey

8.Whisky another bottle of get

9.Ponder the meat thermometer

10.Glass yourself a pour of whisky

11.Bake the whisky for 4 hours

12.Take the oven out of the turkey

13.Floor the turkey up off of the pick

14.Turk the carvey

15.Get yourself another scottle of botch

16.Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey

17.Bless the dinner and pass out

The Turkey Hunt

I have been looking and looking for Thanksgiving things.  First we were going out to eat, my nephew, my husband and me.  Then we are staying home and hosting 10 for dinner.  That is not bad since usually the fam is in the almost 20 range.  I love holidays and think the most fun is the stupid stuff that you set the table with, at Christmas you have the chocolate Santas and such so natch, I am looking for the chocolate turkeys we always had in years gone by.   It has been a search and a half people!  There is nothing out there that sings Happy Thanksgiving.  Happy Harvest is the closest I have come.  Are Pilgrims offensive?  Do Turkeys offend as well?  When did this happen?

Any how....I have been on a mission and I must report that today........TA DA  we have met the challenge and surpassed my expectations.  The Turkey hunt has been successful -- extremely expensive but ....when success is the only option... who gives a rat.  I give to you the turkey hunt.  Gobble Gobble!

Quite a flock.  No?  Happy Turkey Day.

Tips for Seniors

Lovemaking Tips For Seniors

1.  Wear your glasses to be sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2.  Set timer for three minutes in case you doze off in the middle.

3.  Set the mood with lighting (turn them ALL off).

4.  Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5.  Write partners name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6.  Use extra polygrip so your teeth don't wind up under the bed.

7.  Have Tylenol ready in case you complete the act.

8.  Make all the noise you want.  The neighbors are deaf too.

9.  If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10.  Don't even think about doing it twice!!

Fear for the Future

I'm reading a book for a book club I have joined.  I've never been in a book club and my first meeting is on Tuesday morning at the local library.  The book we are reading is The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom with John and Elizabeth Sherrill.  It is Corrie's true story about WWII in Holland and how her family helped numbers of Jewish people escape the Nazi occupation.  It is really a fascinating picture of everyday life in a small part of Holland and how ordinary people are placed in extraordinary circumstances.  Here is a bit I just read and it is haunting me with it's description of then and how closely it resembles today.

"That was another thing it was hard to adjust to---newspapers that no longer carried news.  Long glowing reports of the successes of the German army on its various fronts.  Eulogies of German leaders, denunciations of traitors and saboteurs, appeals for the unity of the "Nordic peoples."  But not news that we could trust."

I know, it's not the same today but close enough.  The papers have an agenda and really no longer carry any news.  They just laud the administration and decry any criticism as outrageous and insane or RACIST!  There are scandals galore circling this current crowd of insiders but we are shuffled along quickly and told there is nothing to see.  I am constantly catastrophizing about this left wing community agitator planning a coup where he appoints himself President for Life and we begin to resemble Venezuela or Zimbabwe.  Our economy is right on target thanks to the efforts of those in charge and there are rumbles of suspending the 2012 election.  The more I read of Corrie Ten Boom's world back in the 30's the more I fear for our future.  I wonder what the other book club members will discuss.

Sorry to be so anxious but I fear, I truly do.  The election in Wisconsin had barely settled in when the unions and Democrats were doing everything in their power to overturn the results.  I think it was just a dry run for what they have planned for the country when the results of the 2012 election come in and those two groups...unions and dems -- have lost even more power.  What they lose in power they make up for in shouting and tantrums and total disruption of everyday life and the main stream media is pounding the drum right along with them.  They think the riots and sit ins of the 60's really worked to get them what they wanted and they haven't moved out of their original playbook.

God help us all - and He will. 

Awesome

This just takes my breath away

Amazing or what?

The First Senior Moment

The First Senior Moment

And that's what happened to the Dinosaurs!

Just Funny

Tell me this isn't funny

Kinda Funny

Ever have days like this?

Which one did you have today?  The hearts and diamonds or the club and spade?

Never Forget

****Times of impact: 8:46 a.m. and 9:02 a.m. Time the burning towers stood: 56 minutes and 102 minutes. Time they took to fall: 12 seconds. 2819 dead from 115 different nations. 343 Fireman/paramedics, 23 NYPD, 37 Port Authority officers. **** WE WILL NEVER FORGET 09-11-01


God Bless All Familes affected....God Bless our Military for protecting our Freedom ...... and God bless America!!!

Labor Day Already? You're Kidding Right?

Yikes it's September!!!  What in tarnation is happening with the clock?  The time she is a flying.  We survived Irene.  Lost power for a bit and some tree limbs arrived in our yard uninvited but we were very blessed .  Some of our neighbors were without power for the week and Our neighbors to the north have had a very tough time.  Vermont of all places.....floods and terrible aftermath of that nasty lady.   A blizzard I can understand but hurricane?  That shouldn't be.

Here's a picture of the ocean in the middle of the big blow.  We had to stay in the car to take the picture since the wind was wild and the sand was blasting.  I'm surprised the car still has paint.

This is normally a very serene scene.  The water rarely gets more than a slappy little wave or two.

So that's the news around here.  We are getting back to normal and now?  Summer's almost at an end.  The farmers' markets will go on and on though.  We have been appreciating the bounty of our local farmers.  Tomatoes are coming out of our ears but sooooo good.  We also had some mighty good home baked goods.  Here's a look at our recent haul.

Those things that look like garlic bulbs are actually some kind of French roll.  They were delish.  Some friends of ours visited and brought some bounty from their local farm.  The biggest squash I have ever had in the house.

Left the wine glas to show the size of those suckers.  Big and awfully delicious.  My husband stuffed that zucchini while I drank that wine.  Here is the before picture of the zucchini.

Tasted even better than it looked.  It could have fed a small army.  We had some fine tasting left-overs.  Well that's it for now.  Back after the Labor Day Doings and maybe more pictures.  Enjoy the weekend.

Kinda Funny Email but Truth is Funnier than Fiction

Ruger is coming out with a new pistol in honor of Senators and Representatives.


It will be named the �Congressman�.

It doesn't work and you can't fire it.
 
 
Maybe it should be named the President....he never seems to be at work.  Happy Another Vacation BO. 

Some Penguin Trivia

Just one more from the email hee haw group....I have such a strong support system:

Just when you think you know everything...you read about this! Wow!!!

I never knew this about Penguins.

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica. Where do they go?

Wonder no more ! ! !

It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life.

The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into and buried. The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:

"Freeze a jolly good fellow"

"Freeze a jolly good fellow."

Then they kick him into the ice hole....

You really didn't believe that I know anything about penguins, did you? It's so easy to fool OLD people. I am sorry, but I fell for it too.

Help Me Rhonda

Oh Lord!  Here I am in the not too distant future.

BEST EVER SENIOR CITIZEN JOKE

A little silver-haired lady calls her neighbor and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her neighbor asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The little silver haired lady says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her neighbor decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then," he said with a deep

sigh ............

"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

Good Morning

You might as well start the day as I did, don't blame me - blame my email:

I caught a stray parrot on my porch this morning.

All he says is, "Good morning, you old fart."

...Is it yours ??

Another Great Email

From today's email arrivals:

This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed. It is reported to have been listed in the Cornish Guardian.

SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me.. Call 01272-6420 and ask for Annie, I'll be waiting.....

Over 150 men found themselves talking to the Truro RSPCA

Ain't this the truth?

Wife's Diary:

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meetat a nice restaurant for dinner.  I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset atthe fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it.


Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much. I asked him what was wrong; He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset.  He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.

On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving.

I can't explain his behavior I don't know why he didn't say, 'I love you,too.'


When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.
He just sat there quietly, and watched TV.  He continued to seem distant and absent.


Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed.  But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else.  He fell asleep - I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that histhoughts are with someone else.

My life is a disaster.

Husband's Diary:

Boat wouldn't start, can't figure it out.

Life in All it's Glory

Should have been here earlier but, life, you know, it just gets in the way.  We had a wedding in the family.  A favorite neice (they're all favorites by the way) married a (I almost sounded like a grandmother for a minute since I was about to type - a darling boy) really nice guy.  My husband's daughter arrived for the wedding and stayed for too short a time after that.  Amazing how much you can miss someone.  We wanted to pack as much as possible into her visit so the week after the wedding was a whirl of day trips and sight seeing and such.  She had to leave before Father's Day and left me with the job of making sure Dad got his card first thing.  I put it on the toilet seat since that is the first place he goes to when he gets up.  This is only the second Father's Day they have had together and the card made him cry -- me too when I was with her and she picked it out. 

Now we have a future visit from his son to plan, that will be in August.  I have another favorite neice who is not related to the other neices except through my marriage.  She is my oldest brother's girl and is about 10 years older than the oldest on my husband's side.  She really wasn't part of my in-law's life since she was married and involved with her own in-laws and also lives some distance away.  She is beginning to feel left out and I am not sure how to handle it.  No one is deliberately omitting her but they don't know her.  How do we make all the years gone by different?  Don't think it can be done.  I don't really know her in-laws either and they have many family things that I hear about but am not included in (thankfully).  I try to talk about those things so she will recognize that we are connected but have closer inner circles that surround us.  Sigh.

Life - see what I mean?  There it is again and honestly, it is grand.  Here's a picture of the centerpieces from the wedding.  I took one home and it is as lovely as when we first saw it.

1919 Advertisement

If you were around in 1919 and came upon the following poster…...

I mean seriously, wouldn’t you just keep drinking?

The Green Thing

I was at the grocery store and the woman in front of me had all of her reusable bags.  Maybe I was being overly sensitive but I detected an aura of self righteousness oozing off of her and a look from the youngster at the register that I took as an attempt to invoke guilt since I had no such bags.  Imagine my delight when I received this in my email later in the day. 

In the line at the store, the cashier told the older woman that she should bring her own grocery bag because plastic bags weren't good for the environment. The woman apologized to him and explained, We didn't have the green thing back in my day.  The clerk responded, "That's our problem today. The former generation did not care enough to save our environment."


She was right, that generation didn't have the green thing in its day.
Back then, they returned their milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled.


But they didn't have the green thing back in that customer's day.


In her day, they walked up stairs, because they didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. They walked to the grocery store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time they had to go two blocks.


But she was right. They didn't have the green thing in her day.



Back then, they washed the baby's diapers because they didn't have the throw-away kind. They dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts, wind and solar power really did dry the clothes. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers, sisters, cousins or their mom's friends, not always brand-new clothing.



But that old lady is right, they didn't have the green thing back in her day.



Back then, they had one TV, or radio, in the house – not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief, not a screen the size of the state of Montana . In the kitchen, they blended and stirred by hand because they didn’t have electric machines to do everything for you.



When they packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, they used a wadded up old newspaper to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.



Back then, they didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. They used a push mower that ran on human power. They exercised by working so they didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.


But she's right, they didn't have the green thing back then..
They drank from a fountain when they were thirsty instead of using a cup or aplastic bottle every time they had a drink of water. They refilled their writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and they replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull.


But they didn't have the green thing back then.



Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or rode the school bus instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. They had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And they didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.



But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful the old folks were just because they didn't have the green thing back then?

Link to a Laugh

Hope everyone had a joyous Mothers Day.  We went out with a couple as we do every Mothers Day for a while now.  None of us have mothers nor are we mothers so we gather to honor our mothers and mothers everywhere.  We call our outing, now don't take offense or be horror struck, the Dead Mothers Day Brunch.  Every year since the last of our mothers passed away we have gathered.  We toast each of our moms and have a fabulous meal, usually at a new place each year.  We alternate the power to choose.  Last year it was our turn and this year the other couple's. 

Following the meal we depart for our respective abodes and fall on our respective couches and call it a day.  This year I ventured onto the computer before my full bellied exhaustion struck and found this.  Funniest ever and have to share.  Hope you had a good day yesterday and hope you get a good laugh from this...later.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw&feature=youtu.be

The Long Way Back

You may or may not know that since November we have been living through a BIG renovation and I mean living through since we lived in the house as it was torn apart and put back together again.  Before the construction we had to pack up everything in the sitting room, kitchen and bathroom upstairs and one of the bedrooms since those were the rooms being torn up and put back together again in a bigger and better way.  Well, it's over and now, since the beginning of April we have been unpacking everything that we packed and now we are wondering where it will all go.  Sigh.

While this has been going on I have of course been indulging in myself because, why not?  My indulgences amount to going out to eat and eating at home and drinking some fine wine and some not so fine wine and eating while having a glass of wine.  Now all of this must cease and desist.  It's approaching warm weather time and you know what that means.  No coats.  Shorts.  Sleeveless things.  OMG.  How can this be?  I am on the return trip to sensibility and it is a very rocky road.

Can that really be true?

And I think that she is correct in that salad thing.

Yes.  It is going to be a rocky road.  Did someone mention ice cream?

Daffodil Days Again!

It was Daffodil Weekend folks....off to Nantucket and the annual viewing of the antique car parade:

Check out the decorated dogs:

And in general having  a swell day enjoying a spectacular island.  Love the Ferry too!  Next year.  Same time.  Same place!

Gotta Love Maxine

I, MAXINE , being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn’t pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Glass of wine or a Bloody Mary
chocolate
Margarita
chocolate
Martini
Cold Beer
chocolate
Chicken fried steak
cream gravy
chocolate
Mexican food
chocolate
French fries
chocolate
Pizza
cup of tea
chocolate
Chocolate
Sex
Chocolate

It should be presumed that I won’t ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

What a Wonderful Holy Day

Happy Easter -

Happy Patriot's Day

Ralph Waldo Emerson

By the rude bridge that arched the flood.

Their flag to April's breeze unfurled,

Here once the embattled farmers stood

And fired the shot heard round the world.

 

Thank God for such brave men and the events that occurred all those years ago without which we would not exist as the land of the free and the brave.  Happy Patriot's Day everyone. 

The Sun is Out

I wandered lonely as a cloud

That floats on high o'er vales and hills,

When all at once I saw a crowd,

A host, of golden daffodils;

Thought for the Day

Thought for the day:

And that's all I've got.

Happy Birthday Buddy

Today would be my oldest brother's birthday.  He would have been 75 today.  He passed away when he was 66.  That just jolted me.  I can't believe he's been gone 9 years.  It will be 9 years in September.  He was the epitome of that, when he was good he was very, very good and when he was bad he was horrid.  But I loved him and I know he loved me, his little sister. 

Happy Birthday Big Boybee.  Love you and miss you even though you were sooo much trouble sometimes. 

That's why God made him so cute. 

Identity Theft - It's Everywhere

The following cases of Identity Theft were brought to my attention via email and I thought I should pass them along:

Now this fellow is just a silly goose isn't he?

If he didn't have that startled look, Stanley might have gotten away with it.

Never could trust a wolf!

Ever since the lodge changed their entrance requirements , things have never been the same.

Missing the Brothers

Just missing my brothers like crazy today.  Here we were oh, so many years ago.  I had been married to my first husband for less than a year and my oldest brother was only 40.  He had his first major heart attack shortly after this picture was taken.  He blamed it on my forcing him to dance the Mexican Hat Dance with me.  We had such a good time at that party.  Weren't we cute?  My oldest brother is the cool dude with the turtle neck and my older brother is the cool dude with the tie.  Loved them loved them loved them.  Still do but they're gone and I miss them like crazy.

Ain't This the Truth?

Walk With Me by theWater, worth the read:

A BEAUTIFUL MESSAGE ABOUT GROWING OLDER

Shit... I forgot the words....



Stress test

Yesterday had Sunday dinner cooked in our new stove and served in our kitchen.  We sat at a table, placemats and real plates, lit candles (the lights aren't wired yet), classical music softly playing in the background, our delightful young niece completed the picture.  It was so wonderful to eat at a table rather than off of my lap in front of the TV.  Yes, the construction is winding down and we are unpacking the garage.  Now to find where everything should be stored.

Here's a stress test for all of you out there.  It arrived via email:

Dealing with Stress



I am not exactly sure how it works, but this is amazingly accurate:


The picture below has 2 identical dolphins in it. It was used in a case study on stress levels at St. Mary's Hospital.


Look at both dolphins jumping out of the water. The dolphins are identical. A closely monitored, scientific study revealed that, in spite of the fact that the dolphins are identical; a person under stress would find differences in the two dolphins. The more differences a person finds between the dolphins, the more stress that person is experiencing.


Look at the photograph and if you find more than one or two differences you may want to take a vacation.

No Need to Reply, I'll be on vacation!!!