Thursday, June 28, 2012

How Quickly Things Turn

Shortly after I posted that last entry about giving people a pass, a friend of mine called and unloaded about her week and how people hurt her and on and on.  Interestingly, I was able to quote that fellow I quoted in my last post and I waxed all philosophical urging her to be gracious and let go and so forth and so on.

Later in the conversation she started to talk about something and I was half listening.  I don't know what grabbed my full attention but it developed that she was talking about my late husband.  She told me things she thought about our relationship that she had never revealed before.  She was and is the friend I have known the longest.  She lived through every minute of my first marriage.  During my troubles she never once let me know what she felt she must let me know now.  She shouldn't have let me know it.  I found myself in the position of hearing things that were untrue and unkind and I had to be gracious.  As I had just advised her, I had to take my advice.  I did it but truth be told I am still in pain and questioning a very long establised friendship.

Funny how things turn and twist isn't it?


OldLady Of The Hills said...

Thank you for your lovely comment to me. I'm not great about getting around these days---it's been a very hard few months...three deaths of people really really close to me--the most recent, my brother, on June
6th. So forgive me for not visiting more often.

Reading this post made me think of a somewhat similar thing that happened to me...Not the same circumstances at all, but, where something a good friend thought I had said eight months ago which she did not respond to at the time, now, eight months later---out of the blue, she wrote me this angry email and I abdolutely did not know where it came from.
I wrote her back and told her that.
A few days later, we had a conversation and she said what she HEARD me say eight months ago. (HELP!). The thing is, I hadn't said that at all!! And I have been nothing but supportive of her. So, this incident and a couple of others with her, recently, has made me re-think my relationship with her. I don't think I ever really saw her clearly, and now I am beginning to.
Why your friend would do that to you is beyond me. What good can come out of all that? Maybe the good will be that you see her more clearly....! But it is very sad.

gemma said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Becca Anne said...

Very sorry to hear that she had unkind things to say. Untruthful words hurt the most when coming from someone near and dear.
wishing you the best!

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