Missin' my Brothers and Others

I know I should have written more and not deleted the one that I did write but..... it's my blog after all and I will do what I will do. It's the only place I can say that and mean it so . . . . . give me a break.



My bother died 3 years ago today. I went out with his girl and we had such a nice night. No one in the world had the sense of humor my brother had and I miss miss miss laughing with him. I miss every one of my family and when I think that as a younger woman I couldn't ever imagine being alone in the world. What a very odd world this is. I loved my family more than earth and would have done anything for any one of them and now! Here I am! Oh there are still friends and more distant family and of course my husband thank you God for him.

Have you seen the German Coast Guard video....we are sinking...what are you sinking about? Google German Coast Guard and you should get there. My friend's husband is from Germany and he showed this to me the other day. He laughed so hard that he got everyone else laughing. Not that the video isn't funny but he was more fun.

Now I must get on with life. I started the day with Joyce Meyer and she had a really good point. Forgiving doesn't mean hanging around with just to prove you forgive. I needed to hear that. This week has been all about forgiving. Am I just sensitive to that message or is it out there for everyone? Chuck Swindall is talking all week about Joseph and how he forgave his brothers. Joyce this morning and there have been other messages on those radio programs. I don't know. Maybe God does use that radio station to get a message to me.

Have a lovely day. It's sunny here and might rain later but it will be a nice day I'm sure.

Wednesday Ramblings

Got a new to me car and I am so happy. My old, and I mean old, car has had no air conditioning for 2 months....yes, July and August. Now, I have the air conditioning I have been dreaming about.

Speaking of dreaming, I heard Coast-to-Coast with George Noury(sp) the other night and he had a man, Robert Moss, on who interprets dreams. Last night I dreamed about setting the table for dinner and I had no forks. What's that about do you think? He said that you should just write down your first instinct and not belabor the details. Sometimes a dream is just a dream you know and not a message from beyond, wherever that is.

I have to get some lunch now before I faint and then I will put some effort into clearing the desk and at that point I will ramble some more. Later

Thoughts

Just thinkin'. Fidel Castro is the working man's Osama. Those videos. How long do you think each one of them has been sleeping the long sleep? I don't think either one will be coming down for breakfast.

I Like George W Bush

After reading all the bursts of nonsense in the news today I have to say it. I think GW is an ok guy. I don't agree with all of his actions but I feel safer with him sitting in the oval office and I think he is a man of integrity and respect. I can't stand all the back biting, posturing morons who are clawing their way to the front of the reporters so they can breathlessly tell some tale out of school.

OK. I'm done with that. Thanks

Thanks be to the Radio Messengers

Had a terrible day yesterday. Too terrible to review here just know it was emotionally painful. As a result I slept poorly after crying for quite some time and I never even tried to stop. I just walked around weeping like a little girl with the oh poor me's. Anyhow, during the night as I slept poorly I had the radio on and at one point I heard Roy Masters and he told me to remove myself emotionally from whatever was going on around me. Watch the action as if it were a TV drama. Then you will be able to make a correct decision and take a correct action. The emotion of the event allows you to be manipulated or to attempt to manipulate others and either is the wrong thing to do. Thanks Roy, that is such good advice. Wring the emotions out of the scene and the issues become so clear.

Later I heard Dr. Laura and one of her callers was weeping. She felt guilt because her life was good. Dr Laura asked her if she had a crappy family and the girl said sort of. You have survivor guilt, she told the young lady, and you should never feel guilty for the good life you earned through good choices. In a way I am being accused of having a better life than someone else. I won't apologize because my family was a good one and someone else's wasn't. Everyone's family can be crappy in many different ways. Man up! Get over it! Thanks Dr. Laura.

Another Dr. Laura epiphany was a caller who said she wanted her friend to understand...Dr Laura stopped her there and said, No. You want your friend to do what you want her to do. You have an opinion and so does she. You want her to change her opinion to yours. You want her to agree. Whenever some one says they want you to understand. That's code for they want you to agree with them. That cleared up a lot of yesterday. Thank you again Dr. Laura.

And last but not least, I awoke after tossing and turning, to hear Dr Dobson interviewing Barbara Johnson and she said that no one could depend on you for joy or rob you of yours. She would look at the sky and say how glorious, it's as if God vacuumed the sky, that's how clean and sparkling it is. Her husband would say, well God will dump out the vacuum bag soon and take care of that. She said that made him happy and she would not rob him of that. She would not let that thought take her happiness away however. She also said that after a terrible day she would thank God the day was done and pray that there would not be another like that in a hurry.

Thank you God that yesterday is over and I pray there not be another of those in a hurry. Blessings to everyone. It's a beautiful day.

No Straying from the Diversity Crowd

This is a very dark decade. There can be no diverse thoughts among those who promote diversity. I draw your attention to Larry Summers.

http://fallbackbelmont.blogspot.com/2007/09/nihil-obstat.html

Moms and Universities

I was just reading about filming the documentary "Indoctrinate U" and it kind of coincided with a conversation I had with a long time friend as I drove home from work. Her mother is 95 and although a lovely lady, she is a very controlling and domineering mom. My friend has been squashed under this woman's thumb for years and unfortunately married her mother too. Her husband, although a lovely man, is controlling and critical and between her husband and her mother she, years ago shut down and just let the two of them take over. Now, at 64, she is beginning to become the rebellious 16 year old she should have been all those years ago. Both her husband and her mother think she needs psychiatric help because she is merely asserting herself for the first time ever. That documentary blurb talked about the University folk calling the police because this film maker was asking some questions that they were very uncomfortable with. They didn't and don't want their "family issues" aired to the outside world. They don't, like my friend's mother, want any independence of thought on the part of anyone they see as less important as they. Just thinkin'.

Imagine This!!!!!

I try to get through the day without outbursts. Honestly! I try! But then, in my vision passes the rear end of a car with a bumper sticker "Imagine Peace" Tra La. Like it's that simple.

IMAGINE VICTORY!!! is it that tough to do? No. We have to imagine running away, frightened, the bully should never be stood up to, don't get him angry, give him your lunch money and he will leave you alone. You stupid doofus. Give him your lunch money and he'll take the rest of your allowance and your bike and your dolls. When confronted on the street, hand over your wallet and watch and wife and kids and car. Does that mugger look familiar to you? You used to give him your lunch money.

EEEEgads! We are hopelessly doomed to be lectured to by old, daffy flower children who blew most of their brain cells on LSD back in the day. Saggy old goofs (my age by the way) looking for some more fun in the park defying mom and dad. I've got to go before I rupture something critical. Later

Good Eats

Another week end - gone. It was close to 40 degrees this morning and only 64 in the house. Brrr. More global warming effects I'm sure. I've been blogging long enough to have another one of these rants available from a previous cold day in September so go to the archives and review for detail. Right now I will only say, the heat? she is not available until the bird goes in the oven. Socks, sweatshirts and sweat pants and thank goodness they are plentiful just not immediately available. Under the bed is a good place to start looking. Once those seal up bags are opened however, it's highly unlikely anything will go back from whence it came.

Supper last night was such a hit I've been told not to lose the recipe. Let me tell you how often that ever happens, never. I will share with you my, from now on, all time favorite Sunday supper recipe, Korean Roast Chicken Thighs.

8 chicken thighs, skin on
1/2 cup soy sauce (use the lowest sodium you can find. House of Tsang is great)
1/2 cup minced green onions (I used our fresh chives from the herb garden)
3 tablespoons sesame oil
3 tablespoons honey
2 teaspoons minced garlic or 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
Preheat oven to 375
Place chicken skin side down in large baking dish (I sprayed it with Pam)
Combine the ingredients above in a bowl and then pour on top of chicken
Bake uncovered 45 minutes
Turn over and bake for another 15 or 20 minutes

Yum. I served with brown rice, ladled the sauce over the rice and broccoli.

Grrrrrrr!

Does Nancy Pelosi ever regret anything she has ever said or done? You know. Like we do. We of little income and power, we of woefully small carbon footprints, we, the people. Do you think she ever, as we would, has those photo ops slam through her brain as the old "Yee Gads, did I really do that?" You know. The pictures from the family party where we played with the hula hoop or put on that big brimmed straw hat that Nana Gumpa brought back from Guadalawhatever, those pictures that when someone brings them out or slide shows them we have to move out of the zip code for a century or seven. THOSE PICTURES!!!! And yet. There she is, in a scarf, or sitting in Syria ever so demurely, knees together, hands delicately placed on those knees turning to the man of the hour as if she were at a college mixer. Yes. I went to those and have regretted every second except for the fodder it provides to know who I mix with today. Honestly. Does she ever run those stupid, damaging, hurtful, disgusting lies she spews to the camera back to herself and when or if she does, does she say, "What a good girl I am." ?

Oh Lord please help me with this anger......I know not what I should do with it.

Thanks to God

Another day here in Happy Valley. The sun is shining as bright as can be. I awoke to a radio show about reaping what we sow. Before you can sow anything you must prepare the soil. You need to plow and then sift or whatever it's called and winnow? if that's the word I heard. Anyway, living here on earth hardens the soil of our hearts and we have to take the time to prepare our hearts for the seed of the Holy Spirit.

I also heard that only three men in the Bible were described as handsome and they were David, Joseph and Absalom. Each were beautifully made.

The other tidbit is that living a life of privilege does not prepare us well to resist temptation or to work hard but Joseph did. He did live the life of the favored son and was spoiled by his aged doting father. Sold into slavery he worked very hard and earned the respect of Potiphar but was tempted by Potiphar's wife and was able to resist. He was tempted daily not just one time and resisted. Even though he was pampered for his entire life he was able to work hard and resist temptation because God was with him. God was always with him and even though he was adored by Jacob and given the favored position he was still humble. Just saying. That whole discussion has planted the urge to read Genesis again. I love that story.

Thank You for Your Word God. Thank You for everything.

What me Worry??

OK so I heard from that Doctor and he was right. Not to worry but he thought I might have gout. I have a swollen knuckle on my right index finger - it's the first knuckle - the largest one and it prevents me from serious jar opening maneuvers and occasionally causes wincing while shaking hands vigorously. He prescribed medication which I will not take or fill since I told him over and over that the pain? It does not exist unless opening a jar or shaking hands.

My uric acid is elevated .5 points over the high number. I am so not worrying.

Is it only Tuesday?

Today began with a transfer of all food from the freezer in the garage to the freezer in the kitchen which had a bit in it already. The food, frozen block solid, had to be unloaded and reloaded and added to. Frozen chicken legs are heavy when they fall on your foot. This exercise in food handling was due to the fact that the ice packs I put in the freezer last night were still soggy this morning. When I pulled out the thermometer it was warmer than freezing and my husband, calm solid block of tranquility that he is, called GQ and the race was on. Now, rather than see if the temperature goes up in that empty freezer, the new one will be delivered tomorrow and we're so done with that other one.

Can't start much better than that now can it? Oh, there is that call from the doctor's office that was waiting for me when I got here at the office. He left a message that I should call him about the lab results. I did. He wasn't available. His nurse called back to see how long I would be here. She couldn't discuss anything. She told me not to worry. Oh sure. Later.

Thoughts

I think it's going to rain today and my lawn will be so happy. It is brown and strawlike since not only has the rain not fallen but no one in this house has turned on the sprinklers. Yesterday I did and the huge sigh of relief and gulping of water could be heard all over the neighborhood. No. Really. The lawn was ecstatic and would have danced if it could have loosened its little feet from the rock hard all dried up ground.



Meanwhile, my husband has been on the hunt for a new coffee maker. The one we have is about seven years old or maybe a little older and it never rests. Lately it's just one pot a day but used to be two or three. He doesn't like the color the inside of the water holder has turned. I clean it (when I think of it and that's when the steam is filling the kitchen) and still, the white is no longer white. The problem with a new coffee maker is that I have an abundance of filters and they are cone shaped. All the new pots he has looked at need the other kind of filter. What a problem huh? I should only have problems like that always.

A neighbor invited everyone to his house to watch the football game. He went clamming the day before and fishing as well. He had a huge amount of steamers and he made chowder out of his fish catch. What a feast. We brought wine and some brought beer and it was so grand to be with such a lovely group of people. We spanned the ages from mid 20's to 60's and how delightful it was to meet and greet people we see in passing. The sound of conversation coming from that house was like a concert of good will.

Today is overcast and sprinkly and perfect. The beach is fogged in and empty. I LOVE it here.

Wondering

Do you think that in the 30's in Germany people sat there saying that all of that junk is about the Jews. It has nothing to do with us. Just mind your own business and life will be fine. Cause if so, that's what we're doing about all that nutty Muslim stuff. So a few heads get chopped off and women get beaten and so what....it has nothing to do with us. What the heck, all those bombs in Israel, it has to do with the Jews....nothing to see here. Move along.

I hate what's happening and I'm ashamed of our journalists and most of our politicians. I truly am.

Go Sox

Just came back from a walk with my neighbors ... hate to say it but we went to the Dairy Queen. Yes. We. Did. What a glorious night. The stars are sparkling away and the sky is so huge and the air is like a narcotic...if I knew what one was like. It just puts you into a coma it smells so fabulous and is balmy and very like palm trees should be out there. As I sit here and type the Red Sox (Yay team) are playing and I think they're winning. When I was a kid, we never had good reception here and my father and uncles would be outside with the radio on the roof of a car and they would be trying to attach something that would be like an antenna and they would hold it over their heads and turn and twist until the sound sort of came in and then we would all have to be very very very silent so we could hear "swing and a miss" or whatever those baseball guys would be saying. The problem here is that without cable, there is no TV and without some really good radio reception you can only get New York channels and those Yankees, we don't like em.

I love it here and I love this time of year. Go Sox.

Thanks

Today was starting to be a lot like yesterday but then I checked in here and Julie, you are the best ever, Julie commented on yesterday's yelping help me's and the psalms she quoted have soothed my soul. I am so grateful. Thanks Julie.

King David is my Hero

I am so beaten. I have been slammed sideways and run over since I got back here. This too shall pass and then I will be stronger and wiser. King David is a good role model. He had Saul after him and I have . . . never mind. David hid in a cave and wrote psalms. I need a cave. I know that I have a world of protection surrounding me. I have prayed and my prayers are always answered. I will pray some more and have me some deep breathing time.

Not too long ago I was panicking every night over things out of my control. I would try to recall that psalm about the chickens under the wings or something of that sort. That image of me under the wings of God. God gathering me up and protecting me was the only way I could eventually drift off. Now I have more issues but having lived through that other one all that time ago I can't panic as I did. Oh, don't get me wrong, I am nervous and stressed but that panic thing doesn't get too far. I stop it with a prayer and then I'm only nervous and stressed. My blood pressure is getting a work out for sure.

Memories

For the record, I am a child of the 50's and 60's. I went to college from 61 to 65 in Harvard Square (or just outside of it). My contemporaries served or died in Vietnam. My female friends burned their bras, yes, they did and marched for the ability to obtain birth control, not abortion, birth control. Do you believe it? Abortion was later. We tip toed around sexual freedom and drugs were a huge unknown out there on the horizon believe it or not. We smoked, just cigarettes, and on occasion snuck a drink with a fake ID. We had curfews, yes we did.


Our schools were all female or all male and when co-ed, the dorms were all segregated by gender. We had rules upon rules upon rules most of which were designed to allow us to reach adult age without ruining our lives. When the rules abound the rebellions are fairly harmless. We didn't have to do much to break a rule since there were so many. We wore bermudas on campus even though they were not allowed during the week. Yes! We did! We talked during study hours and left our dorms to smoke cigarettes on the grounds even though, you got it, it was not allowed. Oh yes, we were the scamps and rebels. We were safe though! During the 4 years of college we knew of one pregnancy and that resulted in a wedding. We talked about everything unlike our mothers who never shared the truth with anyone most of all not with a family member. We would have known about any huge issues, there were, after all, only 85 of us in our class. We all knew each other and although we had our separate groups, we all interacted, if only to talk about each other.


We didn't have cell phones or phone lines in our rooms. Each floor of the dorm had a pay phone and believe it or not, in our three story dorm each of the pay phones worked on the same number so if one was in use on one floor neither of the other two would work. They were extensions of the first phone. How did we survive? Yet we did. One TV in the common room on the first floor. Imagine getting everyone to agree to watch one show? We learned how to co-operate or do without. Actually I don't remember watching much TV. Mostly we gathered in the smoker and talked forever.

We gathered and talked but not about much. We talked about tests coming up weekend festivities or boredoms. We talked about people places and things. I don't recall much going on in the political arena and yet we lived through the Kennedy assassination, the Great Society and the evacuation of Saigon. Most of our friends were engaged to or married to boys of draft age who either enlisted to avoid total loss of control or pursued diligently student deferments. There were none, that we knew of, who skipped to Canada or joined the Kerry nonsense.

I don't know about you but during the Watergate fiasco I turned the radio and the TV off and walked away from just about every serious discussion since somehow, without delving into the political scene, I knew the playground scene. Yes, I was trained to be a teacher and I could see the bullies on both sides. The side that won had the big microphone and they are still pounding on it. They protect their own and pig pile on the other side. It's been going on for centuries and it is still going on. I was tired of it back then and boy am I now. I could go on and on (and probably will later) but for now.....I have a bagel burning and coffee to drink. Later.