Well, yesterday I spent time thinking about therapeutic events and remembered ALANON. Boy that group got me through some times of my life and now that I have no active alcoholics in my vicinity I tend to put their teachings aside. This morning I heard my radio preachers zero in on, what else ? Peace in your heart. You arrive there by stopping the attempts to control people and things and anything but yourself. It seems to be the theme of the moment. Dr. Phil had difficult brides on his show and one particularly unattractive young woman was astonished that the audience didn't care for her behavior and let her know it through their laughter, hissing applause for Dr. Phil or her mother. She spoke harshly to the audience telling them that they should stop their comments because they didn't know how difficult she had whatever it was she had. Dr. Phil said to her that they would respond as they wished because, surprise, she didn't control them.
I also heard this morning that we can live more peacefully with each other by allowing others the right to be wrong and not impose our views and wishes on them. They will behave as they wish and we can't control them except through the laws of the land of course.
Alanon basically teaches that very thing. You can't control anyone's behavior......Only your own. You allow people the freedom to behave as they will whether you agree with it or not . Of course you express yourself, you let them know that certain actions or behaviors are their choice, not yours and you distance yourself from their acts. They know you love them but you don't condone and won't provide them with support for the actions which you find offensive.
Or something like that....It is a very freeing principle and kind of falls into the next topic which came up....Be still and know God.
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