Sunday, March 18, 2007

Offsets for Sale

Erin goes bra-less. That was how we used to greet St Patrick's day back in Jr. High. I guess there is no such thing as Jr. High now, is it called Middle School? That's like Middle Earth right? Anyhow it sure didn't pay to be named Erin back in those days and actually I don't think I even knew an Erin.

We had the usual Global Warming kind of weekend. Twenty degrees Fahrenheit, windy and snowy followed by buckets of rain and more wind and milder temperatures, thirties or so and then cold again. Imagine what the weather would have been if it weren't for that Warming thing? My husband and I were chatting as we drove around the world to do errands and he was going on a rant about those carbon offsets that people were buying. I think there's a sale this week. They are putting up tables at the Middle School and the kids can buy enough offsets to allow them to actually breathe heavily and fart. You think I joke? Wait and see. Girl Scouts will have to ditch the cookies due to trans fats and they'll be selling those offsets door to door.

Now that the foundation is in place, Al is set up like Jimmy Jones, he just hasn't moved his minions to an isolated location yet. His followers will be selling offsets at the airports and bus terminals dressed in green. Offsets for Mother's Day will be all the rage. Hallmark will be printing special gift cards. Tom Cruise - Eat your heart out. Forget that Clear stuff . . save the planet....buy an offset.

I have to get a life...I really do.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well written article.