Wednesday, August 31, 2005

faith in the day

Woke up this morning anxious. Too much sleep for a change. Read a passage from "My Utmost for His Highest" (I think that's the name) and it said that we concern ourselves too much with our own circumstances and lose the joy of serving the Lord. I did that yesterday while doing curtains and windows in the guest room. I was thinking of how many people slept in that room, including myself. The circumstances that created the visitations varied from tragedies to simple visits but there had been an array of "guests" in that room and very few had ever contributed monetarily to their stay. Even those that had contributed didn't really take much of a financial burden off of me or us.

I remember that I thought, as I hung the curtains, that if I had the money I spent on all those guests, I would not be scrimping now. Actually I'm not yet scrimping but I always fear that I will be. That thought took the joy out of the act of selflessness that opened my doors to those "guests". Hospitality after all is a way of serving the Lord by serving others and it should never be done with a price tag. I wonder if I have always put a price on what I did and if I did, I hope I can change that. My eyes have been opened and now I can change.

Have a good day.

Friday, August 26, 2005

observation

An acquaintance of mine only has two emotions, rage and self-pity. The use of these is like driving a car stuck in a ditch. Rage is full forward throttle to the floor and self pity is full reverse, same position of the throttle. This only serves to dig the vehicle deeper in the mud. The only way to get out and go forward is a gentle rocking motion with perhaps a good push from an outside party.

Hmm....

life and all

Life is a lot of things but it's never boring. Even when someone says they're bored to me it just means that it's a moment of quiet. I remember as a kid being bored, or at least telling my mother I was. It was more of a whine actually and a plea for her to tell me what I could do. She would run through a list of unappealing things that would keep anyone busy.

"Wash the windows, pick up your room, clean up the porch, rake the yard, brush the dog, color, cut out paper dolls, dust, etc., etc., etc., " None of these things met with my approval but I got my mother's attention and perhaps that was what I was looking for.

Now when I'm bored, mother is gone and I annoy all my friends. I am so blessed to have all my friends. Our conversations range from deep philosophical discussions to short, angry spats. Either way the interaction erases the boredom and life rolls on. I think all that boredom is is the lack of human interaction.

Hmm, I must be bored. Look at that deep philosophical thought.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

searching and pondering

Read a headline this am which reminded me of a dream I had last night. My hubby and I were traveling to England and to go through customs you had to sit on a chair which swung from the ceiling and was connected to a scale. Yes. They weighed you before entering. Think of it. What a deterrent to travel, at least for most of us gals. The chair swung and the scale bounced and only when it settled could your weight be read. Fortunately it registered in stones. Everyone waiting their turn, for the most part, were poorly educated Americans such as myself to whom a stone means nothing.

I wondered why the total weight of the visiting public had to be known. Would the Island sink under a certain poundage, or stonage to be correct. Would people be turned back once the limit, whatever it was, had been reached?

I wonder what the whole thing meant? Anyone out there to analyze a dream?

Thursday, August 11, 2005

a happy return

searching and pondering

Look how long it's been. Oh my. This speaks to my ability to commit. I must surely try to be at least a monthly poster. Since I last wrote I have gone on an amazing journey. My first cruise and a tour of Alaska. Both were overwhelming. The luxury of the cruise was something I will look forward to again in the future. I have troubles with elaborate service I discovered. I feel guilty being waited on. My mother's voice echoes in my head, "You're strong and healthy. Go get your own ---- (fill in the blank with whatever)".