Spring - It's out there. It Just Takes Time

So far so good.  No snow only rain and muck and occasional ice.  We only have 2 more months before the daffodils spring up.  The biggest problem with winter is the easy out I have to not walk.  I am too old and out of shape to blow off the exercise but winter gives me a hall pass.  We do have a community center nearby and there are treadmills and stair climbers and weight machines.  My conscience is nagging at me to go forth and sign up.  Luckily today is Sunday and they are not open, at least the sign up desk isn't.  You can see how lazy I am by the number of times I have written something new on this blog.

I do have a picture for you and it sings to me.  I yearn for the day I look out my window and see:

Rain and More Rain

Rainy Winter Day Here

Very Little Effort Here

I'm kind of liking this recycle thing....for one thing it lessens my anxiety.  I look back over the years and I can see how little things have changed, at least around here.  For another thing, it gives me something to put on this place without a lot of effort.  See?  Things haven't changed around here.  Here's one from January 2nd some years ago... 2009 to be precise.

Friday, January 02, 2009

A New Year - A New Beginning

And now for the rest of the story. Right now there isn't one. I am stuck in a too much time to do things so who wants to do them anymore kind of mood. You know? Here's how I always felt, I know you're dying to know this. I would be at work and all the time, in my head would be, "If I were home I would so be scrubbing the tiles in the shower, or the kitchen floor, or cleaning out those closets." I would be at home and my head would be all "If I were in the office I would get that presentation completed, finish that report, work on that lesson plan."

Here I am home, lots of time, my entire office function is here with me and yet . . . . here I am. I am only here, typing because the last thing I want to do is scrub the tiles or finish that report. What is my head to deal with now? It has no idea what to think. Happy New Year for heaven's sake.

Oh and by the way. . those Resolutions? I never did get to them so I have decided to accept myself as I am and see what happens. I mean, really, I have been working on change for decades and as I look back I can see that the changes I wish to make are the same, year after year after year. Therefore, I conclude that the changes I was making the efforts to accomplish are probably not very good for me. I will accept myself as I am and if a change should occur, why I will accept that as well. So I guess you could say that my resolution is to relax and - - now there I go....after I said there would be only that acceptance thing. I'm quitting now while I'm ahead.

I am meeting a new Primary Care physician today. It's January 1st, time for the annual change of health insurance thanks to the company I retired from. Actually, it's the 2nd but everything changes on the first. That means the next couple of months will be devoted to lining up the PCP, then the Cardiologist, the Dermatologist, the Eye people, the prescriptions all have to be re-done since whenever the year is up, the changes that are made are such that the group I lined up the year before don't accept the insurance I have for the coming year. I guess that former company of mine would prefer to have as few retirees as possible on the pension account so they figure ways to up the stress level and some of us are bound to succumb to it and honestly, when you have to spend hours dealing with the customer service people those insurance groups submit you too...a stroke isn't far away. Wish me luck.

Recycling

I'm nothing if not a recycler -- here's an old one from Thursday December 15, 2005

Ten Degrees

That's the temperature not the degrees of separation thing that hit Broadway. Yowzer it is COLD. But in the scheme of things it could be worse. My mother would always cringe when I tried to smooth over the bad event of the moment by saying that . "Don't worry", she'd say, "They'll get there." Yup, I come from a long line of optimists. We always were told that we weren't Irish on my mother's side. How all the other family members on that side were and we weren't never puzzled me. After all, they were all Catholic and we weren't so if that is possible, why not the Irish thing. My father's family was Scottish in every direction you looked so in my mother's view, so were we. That Irish surname and brogue of the older aunts could just as easily have been Scottish. As I get older and fall into what my aunt (on my mother's side) would call the blues, I realize that it's a gift from my Irish genes. The Irish do have that melancholy unlike any other group. It's deep and mystical as well as musical. They, or I should say I, weep without warning and go inside to uncover old hurts and pain. We sigh a lot and isolate to curl up, listen to maudlin music to blend with our thoughts. Then, it seems, equally without warning, we find something so startlingly funny about the worst thing imaginable that we laugh as inappropriately as we cry and back to level, life goes on.

So I go ----